Friday, May 26, 2006

Brief Anger

Most days I venture down to the Starbucks Coffee located in the building next to mine at around 9 am. Although I was a blue collar, Dunkin Donuts coffee drinking, Starbucks hater at one point, Starbucks has grown on me. There is something about their coffee that gives me a lift Dunkin Donuts just can't match. Those who know me would not be surprised to learn that I usually can't just order coffee...there needs to be some type of food involved as well. The Starbucks Apple Fritter fills this role quite well. For the unintiated, it is a cinnamon roll-type deal, glazed and filled with little bits of apple. In other words, it's right in my wheelhouse. However, despite the obvious demand for this item (some days it is sold out quite early), the Bucks just can't seem to keep it in stock. Hence, many mornings when I walk down expecting to return to my office with a cup of coffee and a doughy slice of heaven, Starbucks disappoints me greatly. This incites brief anger, although I am usually over it by the time I start thinking about what I am going to eat for lunch. I am a pretty positive person, but there are certain things like this that can cause a brief period of anger. In honor of the Starbucks employees who fail to understand the concept of supply and demand, here is a list of things that never fail to anger me, even if ever so briefly:
  • the person(s) on the morning train who feel the need to spread out and take up valuable space with their newspaper or magazine, apparently unaware of the fact that there are humans packed like sardines in the train car around them.
  • people that walk very slowly in groups of 3 and 4 side-by-side on city sidewalks, totally oblivious of those around them.
  • the Chipotle that has people lined up almost out the door, yet refuses to utilize the "two cash registers" concept....Pablo, no matter how fast and carelessly you throw ingredients into my burrito, I am still going to get backed up at the register, so do us all a favor, and chill out with the corn salsa spoon.
  • any fast food or drink restaurant employee that becomes angry when I attempt to use a coupon. Ma'am, I ensure you my coupon will not be coming out of your paycheck, and although I know it is a huge hassle to lift up that little tray in the cash register to put my coupon underneath, please, if i wanted "coffee with a scowl", I would order that.
  • 95% of sports talk radio callers...this is the main reason I don't listen to it anymore. Joey from the South Side can't seem to fathom why another NBA team wouldn't want to trade their superstar for all of the Bulls' useless bench players. Honestly, if you ever want to feel like you are in the top 5% of intelligent humans, just listen to sports talk radio for about an hour.
  • hipsters, aka hippies without a cause. You know who you are, giving me that condescending look as I get on the subway after work. Vietnam is over. President Bush doesn't care what you think. The "establishment" isn't out to get you. Not everyone that wears a backwards baseball cap and a polo is a "frat boy clone." Your art sucks. Take off the dark-rimmed glasses, wash your hair, get some jeans that fit, and quit being a drain on decent society.
  • the Moneyball vs. old school baseball debate. Here is the truth: a lot of scouts are full of shit and numbers can't explain everything. Baseball is a complex game and the no one has all the answers. Appreciate the value of both sides, and move on.
Maybe next time I will do a list of things that make me smile, like food, which I am about to eat.

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